I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
