I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
