is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
