Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
im six kinds of drunk right now
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
