I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize