so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
