I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
