how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
