I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
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