You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
