the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You may now shotgun with the bride
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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