I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Randomize