i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
The Olympian is in my bed
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
