I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize