shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
