my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
