Texts From Last Night

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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.

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  (781): I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore. http://tfl.nu/ktqn
  Replies (8) Good night (2067) Bad night (636)
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  (661): View more from California

  seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome

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  (661): seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome http://tfl.nu/g749
  Replies (19) Good night (618) Bad night (3037)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?

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  (253): i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class? http://tfl.nu/um7r
  Replies (46) Good night (2105) Bad night (4665)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?

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  (503): Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem? http://tfl.nu/dk03
  Replies (24) Good night (761) Bad night (3160)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.

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  (330): The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life. http://tfl.nu/g5ok
  Replies (37) Good night (15500) Bad night (1296)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.

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  (417): Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever. http://tfl.nu/md7w
  Replies (30) Good night (12166) Bad night (1187)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.

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  (216): The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first. http://tfl.nu/lmqj
  Replies (8) Good night (1948) Bad night (754)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  the head trauma was worth the blowjob.

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  (602): the head trauma was worth the blowjob. http://tfl.nu/e9mc
  Replies (12) Good night (2222) Bad night (840)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.

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  (314): Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there. http://tfl.nu/fiix
  Replies (6) Good night (1261) Bad night (1296)
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  (562): View more from California

  When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.

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  (562): When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid. http://tfl.nu/iodi
  Replies (5) Good night (1303) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick

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  (757): Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick http://tfl.nu/3rkl
  Replies (8) Good night (569) Bad night (1023)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.

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  (610): porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy. http://tfl.nu/gke1
  Replies (12) Good night (2374) Bad night (452)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet

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  (708): I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet http://tfl.nu/9ro9
  Replies (2) Good night (742) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wow.

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  (570): Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand? (1-570): Wow. http://tfl.nu/2i6h
  Replies (0) Good night (485) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?

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  (716): Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people? http://tfl.nu/zzej
  Replies (0) Good night (435) Bad night (224)

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