Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book

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  (303): I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book http://tfl.nu/0iyr
  Replies (18) Good night (1531) Bad night (6746)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches

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  (337): we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches http://tfl.nu/7vm5
  Replies (15) Good night (3949) Bad night (560)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college

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  (920): Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college http://tfl.nu/rv3o
  Replies (67) Good night (4644) Bad night (1437)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.

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  (613): So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely. http://tfl.nu/77c9
  Replies (58) Good night (8423) Bad night (2163)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.

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  (336): I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty. http://tfl.nu/8sow
  Replies (8) Good night (5036) Bad night (642)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am

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  (716): I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am http://tfl.nu/oz9f
  Replies (5) Good night (3311) Bad night (1290)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins

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  (917): I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins http://tfl.nu/1uxv
  Replies (6) Good night (1771) Bad night (683)
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  (818): View more from California

  Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."

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  (818): Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right." http://tfl.nu/w7y1
  Replies (8) Good night (756) Bad night (1376)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.

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  (814): The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain. http://tfl.nu/8v87
  Replies (1) Good night (1085) Bad night (435)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.

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  (603): Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride. http://tfl.nu/at65
  Replies (6) Good night (861) Bad night (458)
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  (310): View more from California

  He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.

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  (310): He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing. http://tfl.nu/4uvb
  Replies (1) Good night (788) Bad night (378)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.

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  (907): I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream. http://tfl.nu/8o4c
  Replies (6) Good night (568) Bad night (465)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha

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  (774): Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha http://tfl.nu/rnub
  Replies (0) Good night (411) Bad night (382)
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  (454): View more from

  Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me

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  (454): Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me http://tfl.nu/lebl
  Replies (1) Good night (273) Bad night (499)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.

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  (931): He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that. http://tfl.nu/egbd
  Replies (1) Good night (262) Bad night (74)

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