WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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