dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize