I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
So much rum. So many feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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