you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
