I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
zippers are such a cool invention
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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