Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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