he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
