Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
