at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Can Purell be used as lube?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Randomize
