his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
