i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
