That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
