im about as happy as oj after his trial
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
