is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
