i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
