i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize