She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I should be a condom model.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize