She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
