My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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