she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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