Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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