Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
