I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
