I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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