their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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