She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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