if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
