Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
