So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
