cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
