i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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