Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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