I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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