when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
