Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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